Three Men And A Baby Review

MPAA Rating: PG
Released: 1987

Three Men and a Baby is a heartwarming family comedy about three bachelors whose lives are turned upside down when a baby girl is left on their doorstep one day. Although the focus of the movie is on the horrified men slowly becoming acclimated to the ordeals of surrogate parenthood, they also accidentally stumble into a tricky situation involving a package of illegal narcotics… drugs that both its owners and the local law enforcement are after.

The film opens during a birthday party held in Peter Mitchell's (Tom Selleck) honor, and while the opening party introduces us to his two friends, Jack Holden (Ted Danson) and Michael Kellam (Steve Guttenberg), none of it really suggests the comedic fun that is to come. Consider the opening moments nothing more than setting the stage for the film, for that's all they really offer.

During the party a friend asks Jack if he can accept a delicate package, hold onto it for a few days and then give it to two men who will come to pick it up on Thursday. Jack of course says yes, but since he's heading to Turkey for an acting job he delegates responsibility for the package to his two buddies. Jack repeats the instructions about holding onto the package until Thursday, leaving no clue as to its contents beyond asking his friends to say nothing to no one since it's a delicate matter.

Later that day Peter comes home and much to his bewilderment he notices a baby on his doorstep! After he and Michael are finished exchanging accusations about who's responsible for the baby, they come to the conclusion that this baby was the "delicate matter" Jack asked them to look after while he was away… and as they experience the "joys" of fatherhood they anxiously count the days until Jack's return so they can express their annoyance.

Some of Three Men and a Baby's best moments are the little things that Peter and Michael experience as they try to quickly take on the role of parents. Michael tries to entertain the baby by turning on the television, only to find to his horror that Dr. Ruth is on and speaking of the joys of sex. Peter learns that changing a dirty diaper isn't as easy as it might appear. The two men freak out during the middle of the night when a police car drives by with sirens blaring, afraid it will wake the baby and prompt another bout of crying. None of these and similar situations are side-splittingly funny, but they will bring a content smile to the face of most viewers since they are rather touching.

In reality the baby was the fruit of Jack and Sylvia (an old fling), and she abandoned the baby on their doorstep thinking Jack could care for her. The package itself was a small box that was tossed aside during the chaos of the new arrival, but the duo doesn't realize it, which leads to a couple very amusing exchanges when two confused drug runners come to pick up the package on Thursday:

Michael: You can tell Sylvia for us that she's got a lot of nerve dumping her problems on our laps.
Man: Who's Sylvia?
Michael: When I first got here, we considered calling the cops.
Man: Hey, wait, wait, wait…
Michael: But we didn't. We stuck it out.
Man: No, wait…
Michael: But you totally disrupted our lives. No, you wait. Hey, we haven't been able to work, or to sleep. And there's been s**t all over this place for days!
Man: S**t!?
Michael: What?
Man: You mean the package? It's busted?
Michael: Busted? Yeah, yeah, you could say that.
Man: Well did you put the s**t back?
Michael: Put it back? No, we had it bronzed for posterity! What do you think we did?

After handing the baby off to the two strangers, Peter and Michael discover the actual package they were supposed to hand off… and worse discover that it contains drugs. They get the baby back, but not before sparking the suspicions of the local narcotics squad.

Jack finally returns from his trip, only to discover that he is now a father and his life will be forever changed. The rest of the movie focuses on his adjustment to family life and the threesome's attempts to shake off the drug pushers that want their package back and clear their names with the local police.

Three Men and a Baby, which was directed by Mr. Spock himself, Leonard Nimoy, is a heartwarming and often humorous look at the trials of unexpected parenthood. Tom Selleck and Steve Guttenberg dominated the screen time since Ted Danson's character was in Turkey for half the movie, and for this I'm glad. Although Ted Danson didn't let the movie down, his performance just wasn't nearly as charming as that of Selleck and Guttenberg.

As an interesting trivia tidbit, Three Men and a Baby is also responsible for creating an urban legend about a ghost boy seen through the curtains in one of the scenes. The legend states that a boy and his mother tragically died earlier in the New York apartment that this movie was filmed in, so he haunts it and that was captured on film by the mysterious presence of a shotgun and a little boy behind a curtain.

Of course this legend is untrue, particularly since the movie was shot on a sound stage, not in an actual apartment. Nevertheless, this urban legend has been passed around with such conviction that even Snopes reported on it. You can learn more about the legend of "Ghost Boy" by visiting their website (just be prepared for multiple pop-ups).

Three Men and a Baby will probably not make you roll on the floor with laughter, though there are some hilarious spots mixed into the overall brew. This film is one of those family comedies that rely on the overall fun atmosphere and warm feelings rather than potent comedic punches, but for what it offers it does a heck of a good job.

Movie rating : 7 stars

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